Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Carb Filled Wednesday!

Today was the day to cave!

Paul and I - well! Needless to say, we weren't getting along very well lastnight . Sometimes "Happily Ever After" doesn't always live up to its title!

The argument carried on into this morning. Since I haven't budged from 147 since Monday, I caved.

For breakfast I throughly enjoyed a chocolate chip waffle with crunchy peanut butter. Compliments of Eggo and Skippy.

By lunch, Paul and I made up. He surprised me, and brought home a Guliano's torpedo sandwich. Ohhh! MY!!!! Lord!!!! I enjoyed every carb filled bite.

Needless to say - the original " carb filled day" plan has been cut short. Since I have gone almost three full weeks without any kind of grains, breads, or pastas - my stomach feels like its in a huge knot. I've been shoving digestive enzyme capsules down my throat for the last hour and a half. * Sigh *

But - it was worth every bite. I will probably be five pounds heavier tomorrow, but every now and then, a girl needs something savory and sweet to remind her that life isn't all that bad! Many thanks to Eggo, Skippy, and good ol' Guliano's =)

" A Thousand Words....

"Sweet Mommy Kisses!"

"My baby cuddle wuddle bug!"

"Where is Mom?"

... could never describe how much I love you, my son - my sunshine! "

Monday, September 28, 2009

Found Photos

My baby sister ( one of three! ) was married in June of this year. There are photos that are still being passed around! Here are a couple that have surfaced - THAT I LOVE, and had to share!

~My First Award~

I have made some great fellow blogger Mommy friends!

By exposing my blog, my heart, and my entries - I have received my very first award.

This was given to me by sweet Cassie who blogs at "Four Apples a Day.. Keeping up with the Appletons in Italy."
Cassie is married to her husband who is serving in the Air-force. With their two children, they are stationed in Italy.

Thanks Cassie for this award! By the way - I'd die without Target =)


I have consistently weighed myself every morning and written it down in my journal for 2 weeks now. I am starting my third week today.

My weight jumps around day to day! Oh the joys of being a woman!

Last night I was discouraged - AGAIN. As Paul and I were getting ready for bed, I began the ten minute grumblings of 'woe is me' -

"Thats it - I guess I'm just going to be 150 pounds for the rest of my life - 150. I better start likin that number, because it seems to like me enough to not GO AWAY!"

Paul, my faithful, encouraging, husband suggested " Well, you write your weight down everyday, which is fine! But compare Monday to Monday, and maybe write down everything you eat, drink, and weather or not you workout that day in your journal. That should be encouraging because you are consistently losing, and you should have some good notes to compare when you gain and when you have lost from day to day."

So this morning, I weighed myself.


2 pounds up from 145 which was just days ago - but comparing to last Monday - that is 2 pounds I lost. The Monday before, when I started this journey, I was 153.

So!!! On a encouraging note - I have been consistently losing week to week. Which is great! I'll take it.

That is 6 pounds in 2 weeks. Encouraging!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Our Button!

After much time spent, lots of effort given, and sorting through pictures and ideas - I am proud to show you our official blog button! Take it, display it, and be apart of our wonderful journey!


It was all worth it. I'm so proud of this little sucker!


Friday, September 25, 2009

Our Thirteen Month Old ( belated! )

For the last couple of weeks, I have faithfully given Cole a spoon with every meal. He fully understands its job - and seems to favor his left hand. ( Like his Grandma Cherrie! )

Our little thirteen month old has also mastered the words - Mommy, Daddy, Beau, Pa ( Grandpa Marc ) PaPa ( Grandpa Rick ) doggie, more, book, please, and what's that. He is working on "thank you" - I know when he says it - but its mixed in with baby jibberish! Speaking of "baby jibberish" -- our Cole Michael goes on blabbeling all day. He babbles to the dogs, to his father and I, to his toys, and I think he has a imaginary friend he likes talking to!

Cole just got his very first timeout a couple of days ago. He fully understood the reprimand! He has only had one other time out since then! He is not a fan!

Our little guy has also turned out to be a lover of love! He loves to give kisses, snuggles, and big hugs. He loves his nap times and bedtime. When he is ready - he lets ya know. For the last several months, as I lay him down - I sway with him for a few minutes. This is our prayer time, and when I wish him sweet dreams. Lastnight - he rubbed my face ( while sucking his thumb of course! ) stroked my hair, gave me a kiss ( without me asking ) and pushed off of me to lay him down ( which he has done for almost 2 months now ! ) It was such a sweet moment.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Twenty Pounds To Getting Pregnant ( update )

I have officially gotten to 145!

This is the lowest I have been since beginning this journey of losing "Twenty Pounds To Getting Pregnant."

Since my 'Goin On Up' post a few days ago, I have been taking it a pound at a time! I have been jogging with the boys ( Beau, Worley, and Cole ) twice this week, and I've done the 'Biggest Loser' video once. My body is pretty sore today - so other then my diet regime, I will be taking it pretty easy to allow my muscles to heal.

I am much more encouraged today then I was a few days ago. I came across a scripture that was pretty powerful.

" He that hath no rule over his spirit is like a city that is broken down, without any walls. " Prov. 25:28

When I have been discouraged or ready to cave on my current craving , these words race through my mind - and it empowers me to have self control and continue to work towards my goal.

Today - the light at the end of that tunnel is much brighter =) On to another pound less!

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

"All in a Snip!"

I woke this morning, and realized...... its time.

This day has been creeping up on us. I use the word "creeping" simply because I hate it!

"Babe - we need to cut Cole's hair."

"No Way!"

"Hun, his hair is in his eyes, and he bats at them. Its uncomfortable for him."



With the company of Grandma and Grandpa - I took him to a salon in Palos Verdes. They have airplanes, and TV's!

As we walked in, the stylist asked his age.

"13 months."

"Oh, he's a little guy."

"Yes, my little man!"

I lift Cole into the super cool antique airplane, the stylist turns "Barney " on the television, and we are ready to go!

" What kind of cut would you like your son to have?"

Geez, how many cuts are out there for little boys? "Something cute!"

As she begins to cut my baby's hair - my mind drifts off to the moment he came into this world. That moment I kissed his little lips for the first time. That moment I was overwhelmed with the greatest love!

Here I am - 13 months later, watching my baby get his first hair cut.

I quickly shake it off, telling myself " Be tough. Do Not Cry!"

Cole did so good. Better then I expected since these days he hates to be confined and loves to roam freely.

As the stylist is brushing off the hair that fell onto Cole's shoulders, she asks " Well, what do you think?"

I take a huge breath since it felt like someone pushed my heart into the pit of my stomach.

Without me saying a word, she says " I know - it changes all in a snip."

"Yea - all in a snip."

My sweet baby boy - here is another accomplished mark in your life.My heart selfishly broke as each strand of your beautiful, blond, baby hair fell onto the floor. This is a memory that I will forever cherish. You are our handsome little man. Thank You for making our lives perfect.
Our hearts are one!
Love you forever,

Monday, September 21, 2009

" Cole - Where are You???"

Our morning routine, is very routine - every morning!

As I was preparing breakfast, silence fell behind the sound of the bacon crackling and coffee dripping.

"Hmmm - what could Cole be into this time? "

The silence has been the result of him doing something he shouldn't be doing, or simply entertaining himself - which he is becoming better at each day.

As I tip-toe around each corner, I quickly become concerned. 'Did Aunt Rachelle open the door and not realize Cole sneaked

"Cole Michael - where are you?"

As the beat of my heart gets heavier and heavier, my concern goes from about a 5 to a 10.

"Cole - please answer Mommy!"

Emma - our little doggie - loves to sleep in! She doesn't come out of her crate until we are just finishing breakfast, every morning!!!!

Emma begins to howl!

I run back into the room - and here is what I found!

"Lord have mercy son!"

Thank You for your help my sweet Emma - you are so faithful!

Meet Kate

Here is yet another heartbreaking prayer request.

This little sunshine's name is Kate McRae. She is battling a brain tumor. She too has a journal through Caring

Here is her story - from her Mom!

Monday June 29th began like every other day, and ended like one we could have never imagined. Our daughter Kate was taken to the dr. for tremors in her right hand. We proceeded to Phoenix Childrens Hospital for a stat CT of her head. At 5:30 I, Holly, Kate's mom, was taken into a room alone and told Kate had a massive tumor on the basil ganglia portion of her brain. I called her dad and our journey has begun. One we never would have chose to be a part of, but was chosen for us, and our sweet Kate. She is now in the Phoneix Children's Hospital undergoing treatment for this disease. Please, our dear daughter needs your prayers, as do we, Aaron, Holly, Olivia and Will.


Ok- my faithful blogger visitors. Whether you pray or not, whether you believe in our Jesus or not - please, in your own personal way.. send her well wishes, and keep this innocent little girl close to your heart. As a mother, I could never imagine watching my baby go through what this littler girl - and so many other children, are going through physically.
Here is her journal website.

Goin On Up

This morning I weighed in at 149.2

*** Urrrgh***

These last couple of weeks has been a big struggle. I have been up and down. Literally.

I have gone from 148 to 146 to 147, back down to 146, then the following day I weigh in at 149.

Its been a bit discouraging. I can't wait to get pregnant - and when I'm looking at the scale and it reads 146 - and the next day its 149, I feel so far from being able to accomplish my wight goal so I can have a healthy pregnancy. =(

So ...

Over with the pit party - now on to working towards my 130-135 goal. I know I can do it. On a more encouraging note, I haven't been past my 150 mark. Which is great! There is still a light at the end of the tunnel. It seems more like a speck today - but its there.

My baby sister ( Shay ) - one of my best friends in the world~~~ she is so encouraging, and one of my biggest supporters, let me borrow 'The Biggest Loser' DVD. She said friends of her husband's -sister has used it, and it has worked wonders for them. I think I need a boost like this. So!!! At Cole's 3:30pm nap - I'm gonna pop that DVD in, and work my bootie off, literally I hope. he he!

Wish me luck!

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Bring The Rain

Throughout our life - we all see trails and tribulations. Its how we come out of those trails that truly makes us who we are as human beings.

This song is so encouraging to me.

"Bring me joy
Bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings you glory
and I know there will be days
when this life brings me pain
But if thats what it takes to praise you
Jesus Bring The Rain"

Friday, September 18, 2009

Meet Bekah

Bekah is a five year old little girl who is currently fighting Severe Aplastic Anemia. Her bone marrow shut down from producing any stem cells, which later turns into mature red & white, and platelets cells in the blood. Her ANC is consistantly been 0 for almost 2 months now and her bone marrow was 99% empty (2nd bone marrow aspiration).

Bekah has to have blood product transfusions to sustain life until we can either get her own bone marrow to jump start through Immune Suppressant Treatment or a bone marrow transplant. Transfusions happen when her blood counts are down. As of now she gets transfusions one time to two times a week.
(Michael, her 4 year old brother, tested negative as a match which would have been our best option.)
Here is a short video explaining the disease.

This prayer request tugged on my heart. For all of you who visit this blog, and pray - even for those of you who don't.. please say a prayer, or even send your well wishes Bekah's way!!!!! She has a website that you can visit.

Guide Dogs For The Blind

For those of you who do not know - My Aunt Rachelle is blind. She, and "Worley" moved in with us almost a year ago.

Many of you are probably thinking " Wow - thats so nice of you." or " Gosh, that has to be hard. "

Don't get me wrong, we have our moments when we collide. But who doesn't that live together? For the most part, I am thankful she lives with us. I had too many sleepless nights when she lived on her own! She loves my son - and I love the idea of him ( and our future children ) having one more person in the house that will love them unconditionally.
Worley is her guide dog. They have been a team for just about five years. He is my eyes when she leaves me, and for this - I am extremely grateful to him. When she graduated from school - and came home with him, I immediately fell in love. He is the biggest love bug!

He barks - A LOT. So much that it drives me nuts somedays. But I quickly remember the duty he has been given - and the duty he fulfills each day. He wasn't given a choice - He wasn't asked if he wanted to do this great, selfless deed. But he does it, and he does it well.

These dogs are remarkable- and too often go unnoticed. When you've been to Disneyland - have you looked around and seen a dog in service? What about at the grocery store - or at the park? They are all around us, everyday! ***** By the way - if you do notice one - DO NOT PET THEM, without permission. This is apart of their training! You can easily offend their handler. But, if you politely ask - I'm sure that the handler will gladly allow you to show gratitude. *****
They have a blog - where we are updated with new graduates, new retirees, new celebrations, passings, and new volunteers.

I wanted to share their blog with you all. I just found it through a news letter we got this month. This is a non-profit organization. They have a button where you can graciously donate. This is one of my most favorite charities, and my newest favorite blogspot. Enjoy =)

Thursday, September 17, 2009

~~Check Up~~

Today was Cole's belated one year checkup with Dr. Chung.

He is ( as expected ) perfect. Ears, eyes, mouth, all look great.

His next appointment will be in December!

Cole's Growth~~~

Length: 33 inches. He is taller then 60% of most children his age.
He has grown 6 inches since June.

Weight : 20lbs and 14 oz. He averages close to 30% his age, and that is because of his height.
He has gained over 2lbs since June.

Entertaining Myself!

Cole loves to play with his blocks, trucks, cars, and dinosaurs. His latest favorite is dragging everything out of his playroom - and using every part of the house to play! Mommy doesn't mind =)

This is a moment I was so happy to catch on video. Its these moments that I love!

Vaccume ----------

For the last few weeks, Cole has been vacuuming with me.

I simply ask " Do you want to help Mommy vacuum?"

He runs into his room, grabs his vacuum - and is ready to go! Paul was helping around the house yesterday, so I took full advantage and snapped away with my good ol' friend - Cannon!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Crazy Hair

I was seven months pregnant with Cole. My bestfriend in the world - Brianne, and her son Jackson ( who is my god-son ) were swimming, and I remember her explaining why she had not yet cut Jackson's hair.

I was thinking - I will never be that Mom. Boys are supposed to have short hair. Of course I said this out loud - and her exact words to me were - " You just wait. Just wait until Cole Michael comes. They are babies for such a short amount of time, and big boys for so much longer. Shorter hair makes them look like 'big boys.' "

Here we are, over a year later, and Paul and I have not cut our little man's hair!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just can't. All for those same reasons Brianne gave.

With that said, Cole is looking more and more like a surfer dude with his copper skin and white blond shaggy do! Its so funny when he wakes up. His hair is a MESS! Here are a few pictures to show you exactly what I'm talking about.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

A Moment -

Sunday night started as any other Sunday night in the Wilkins house hold!

Until -

Paul and I put Cole to bed, and as we were tip-toeing back into the living room.. Paul says ...

" Hey, I looked for our wedding DVD today and couldn't find it - do you know where it is?"

" Yea - but why do you want it?"

"I want to watch it .... together."

"Right now?????!"

"Yea - was there something else you wanted to watch instead?"

I was shocked - lost for words would better describe my over-all feeling. The same man I had to beg to watch this DVD on OUR anniversary, now wants to watch it - just because!

"No -We can watch it, I'm just kinda surprised!"

As I'm searching through the DVD's - I'm thinking - 'you better hurry up Sheena, he might change his mind and this moment will be lost for good!'

I put it in the DVD player - sit down next to him, and we begin to watch this magical day in our lives.

Half way through - he leans into me and begins telling me 'how much he loves me, and that I was the most beautiful bride - and how lucky he is to have such a beautiful wife.'

All the while - I'm now thinking " what in the heck is going on? " you know how the old saying goes ' who are you and what have you done with my husband?' YEA- this is exactly what I was thinking.

My husband is FAR from romantic. He is the GUYS GUY! This year for my birthday, I was surprised because my birthday card was actually signed and put into the envelope. It wasn't sealed - but its a step from just handing it to me and saying "Babe - this card says everything I wanted to say!" HAHA Yes, this is my husband.

I was again, lost for words. He kissed me, and went back to his comfortable position watching the television.

A few minutes later, the video goes to a part where its me in my dress - and I'm looking out the window - its black and white, and looks like light is shining down on me. Very typical wedding blah blah!

Paul says " Wow, I can't believe I married you- you are just so beautiful. "

Stunned, I'm still stunned. I write a lot on this blog of mine, and its taken me almost two days to write about this!

Paul Michael - Thank you for such a beautiful moment. I married you that day, and I'd marry you now! You are the love of my life. Although these moments are far and few between, I wouldn't have you any other way. Luva you.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Treasures In My Boots

Since Paul is a Motorcycle Officer - he wears big ..what I like to call " manly" boots! Since Cole started to realize there is a whole world around him, he has been infatuated with Paul's badge, uniform.. and the newest is, his boots!

When Paul gets home his routine is very simple - and very much like this everyday -

Kiss the wife
Kiss the kid
open the refrigerator
makes some sort of comment about the laundry
makes his way to our bedroom ( cole follows)
take his shirt off
takes his vest off
takes his boots off
takes his pants, socks, and undershirt off
sets his atm, phone, and money on the night stand

All the while, talking to Cole, asking him how his day has gone. Somewhere in between yells to me asking "whats for dinner?"

Makes his way to the kitchen - usually pours himself a cocktail

Lets add - Cole NEVER leaves the room

He stand there and stares at his uniform - and somewhere in between, puts something in one of Paul's boots.

The treasures have included
a sippy cup
a GI Joe Man
a dinosaur
a couple of fruit snacks
and a car

You know how cats bring birds and rats to your doorstep? Its their own vial way of thanking you for your deed!

Well - I think this is Cole's special way of saying " I love you Dad!" and maybe " think of me while your at work... have a sip from my sippy, and while your at it, toss a fruit snack in your mouth. They're my favorite Dad! You can also play with this dinosaur and car. I like too. I love you Dad!"

he he

Daddy loves every treasure you leave in his boots bubba! .. and Mommy giggles everytime!!!!

Friday, September 11, 2009

Remebering 9/11


You say you will never forget where you were when
you heard the news On September 11, 2001.
Neither will I.

I was on the 110th floor in a smoke filled room
with a man who called his wife to say 'Good-Bye.' I
held his fingers steady as he dialed. I gave him the
peace to say, 'Honey, I am not going to make it, but it
is OK..I am ready to go.'
I was with his wife when he called as she fed
breakfast to their children. I held her up as she
tried to understand his words and as she realized
he wasn't coming home that night.

I was in the stairwell of the 23rd floor when a
woman cried out to Me for help. 'I have been
knocking on the door of your heart for 50 years!' I said.
'Of course I will show you the way home - only
believe in Me now.'

I was at the base of the building with the Priest
ministering to the injured and devastated souls.
I took him home to tend to his Flock in Heaven. He
heard my voice and answered.

I was on all four of those planes, in every seat,
with every prayer. I was with the crew as they
were overtaken. I was in the very hearts of the
believers there, comforting and assuring them that their
faith has saved them.

I was in Texas , Virginia , California , Michigan , Afghanistan ..
I was standing next to you when you heard the terrible news.
Did you sense Me?
I want you to know that I saw every face. I knew
every name - though not all know Me. Some met Me
for the first time on the 86th floor.

Some sought Me with their last breath.
Some couldn't hear Me calling to them through the
smoke and flames; 'Come to Me... this way... take
my hand.' Some chose, for the final time, to ignore Me.
But, I was there.
I did not place you in the Tower that day. You
may not know why, but I do. However, if you were
there in that explosive moment in time, would you have
reached for Me?

Sept. 11, 2001, was not the end of the journey
for you. But someday your journey will end. And I
will be there for you as well. Seek Me now while I may
be found. Then, at any moment, you know you are
'ready to go.'
I will be in the stairwell of your final moments.